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How To Talk To Your Parents About Hiring A Caregiver In Ottawa

  • Feb 3
  • 6 min read

Having a conversation with your parents about hiring a caregiver can feel like walking a tightrope. You may be worried about their safety, struggling to manage caregiving on your own and losing sleep over what to do next. At the same time, you do not want your parents to feel like you are taking away their independence or making decisions for them.


If you're feeling this strain, rest assured you are not alone. This is a common crossroads for many families as loved ones grow older, begin to experience cognitive changes, or have increasingly complex health needs to manage.


The good news is that talking about in-home senior care in Ottawa does not have to be a battle. With the right approach, it can be a caring, respectful conversation focused on helping your parents stay safe, comfortable, and independent, wherever they call home.


At 613 Home Care Services, our team supports families with these conversations every day. Below are practical steps to help you talk to your parents about hiring a caregiver in a way that respects their dignity and your relationship.


Understand why this conversation feels so hard

Before you speak with your parents, it can help to pause and acknowledge why this feels so emotional.


Many aging parents worry that accepting help means:

  • Losing their independence

  • Being treated like a child

  • Having strangers in their home

  • Becoming a burden to their family


As adult children, you might worry about:

  • Hurting their feelings

  • Triggering conflict or defensiveness

  • Being seen as ungrateful or bossy

  • Admitting that you cannot do it all on your own


Recognizing these feelings on both sides can help you approach the conversation with more empathy and patience. This is not simply a logistical decision about home care. It is a vulnerable moment for everyone involved.


Prepare yourself before you start the conversation

Going into the conversation prepared can make it calmer and more productive. Before you sit down with your parents, take some time to:


  1. Clarify your main concerns

    • Are you worried about falls, wandering, or medication errors?

    • Are you feeling burnt out as a caregiver?

    • Are there specific tasks they are no longer managing well?

  2. Learn about local options

    Research services such as in-home senior care in Ottawa, palliative and end-of-life support, personal support workers, and respite care. Visit local Ottawa websites so you can explain what help could look like, rather than speaking in vague terms.

  3. Think about your goals 

    The conversation is not just about hiring a caregiver. It is about helping your parents:

    • Stay in their home safely

    • Maintain dignity and control

    • Reduce stress for everyone involved


When you are clear on your own thoughts, you will be better able to listen and respond with compassion.


Choose the right time, place, and tone

Timing and setting matter. Try to:

  • Pick a calm moment, not during a crisis or right after a fall or argument

  • Sit somewhere private and comfortable, without interruptions

  • Keep your phone away so you can be fully present


Approach the conversation gently. You might start with:

“I have been feeling worried about how much you are managing on your own. Can we talk about how things have been going and how I can support you better?”

The goal is to open a dialogue, not to deliver a decision.


Use “I” statements and focus on care, not control

How you phrase things can make a big difference. Instead of saying, “You cannot live alone anymore” or “You need help,” try using “I” statements that share your concern and love. For example:

  • “I feel worried when I hear about you almost falling in the bathroom.”

  • “I am afraid something might happen when I am not here.”

  • “I want you to be able to stay at home as long as possible, and I think some support could help with that.”


You can also focus on specific tasks, rather than implying that they cannot manage their life:

  • “What if someone came in a few times a week to help with housekeeping and meals?”

  • “How would you feel about a personal support worker helping with showers so you do not have to worry about slipping?”


This keeps the focus on safety, comfort, and independence, not on taking away control.


Start small and frame care as a way to stay independent

Many parents are more open to home care when they realize it can help them stay in their own home for longer, rather than forcing an early move to a retirement residence or long-term care home.


You might suggest:

  • Trying housekeeping support once or twice a week

  • Starting with respite and companionship, a few hours at a time

  • Adding personal support (PSW) visits for specific tasks like bathing, dressing, or medication reminders


Explain that in-home senior care in Ottawa can be flexible and customized:

“It does not have to be every day, and we can start with a small amount of help. If you do not like it, we can adjust. I just want us to explore what could make life easier for you.”

Introducing care as a trial or experiment can feel less overwhelming than presenting it as a permanent change.


Listen to their fears and validate their feelings

Your parents may react with anger, sadness, or denial. They might say things like:

  • “I do not need help.”

  • “I do not want a stranger in my home.”

  • “You are trying to put me away.”


As hard as this can be to hear, try to listen underneath the words. They may be expressing fear, grief, or a sense of loss. Responding with empathy can help:

  • “I hear that you are worried about having someone new in the house.”

  • “It makes sense that this feels like a big change.”

  • “I am not trying to take anything away from you. I am trying to make sure you are safe and supported.”


Sometimes, simply knowing that you respect their feelings can soften resistance.


Involve them in the decisions

Wherever possible, invite your parents to take an active role in the process. You might:

  • Look at Ottawa home care websites together

  • Ask what kind of person they would feel comfortable with

  • Talk about whether they prefer a male or female caregiver

  • Discuss what days and times would feel best


At 613 Home Care Services, we prioritize your parents' dignity and sense of control by involving them in the creation of their personalized care plan. This plan is carefully designed to align with their established routines, personal preferences, cultural background, and core values.


Consider bringing in a neutral third party

Sometimes it helps to have another trusted professional reinforce the message that extra support could be beneficial. You might ask:

  • A family doctor

  • A nurse or social worker

  • A spiritual leader

  • A care coordinator from an Ottawa home care agency


Hearing from a third party that in-home care can improve safety, ease stress, and support wellbeing can make the idea feel less like a “family argument” and more like a thoughtful health decision.


The team at 613 Home Care Services is happy to speak with families and explain how services work, whether care is needed at home, in a seniors home, hospice, or a long-term care home.


How 613 Home Care Services can support your family

At 613 Home Care Services, our slogan is “personalized care wherever you call home.” We deliver our services in Ottawa across all living environments, including private homes, retirement residences, hospices, and long-term care settings.


Our services include:

We know that hiring a caregiver is not just a practical decision. It is a deeply personal one. Our community-focused team takes the time to build trust, listen to your parents’ stories, and provide care that honours their history, culture, and preferences.


Ready to take the next step?

If you are worried about a parent and wondering how to start this conversation, you do not have to navigate it alone. Speaking to a trusted Ottawa home care provider can help you feel more confident, prepared, and supported.


613 Home Care Services offers friendly, no-pressure consultations where you can:

  • Ask questions about in-home care

  • Learn what a personal support worker can help with

  • Explore options for respite, companionship, and palliative support

  • Get guidance on how to approach the conversation with your parents


Connect with us today:


We are here to help you navigate this journey. Our approach focuses on finding a gentle way forward that prioritizes your parents' safety, dignity, and independence, while also providing essential support for you as a dedicated caregiver.


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